I started the last day of 2012 never intending to write down any sort of end-of-year reflection. However, as 2013 inched closer, I felt more inclined to at least document a little something.
This past year I have had ample time to reflect on the position I am in. Financially, I'm in a place that scares me a little, but it has been slowly improving as of late. Emotionally I feel that I've grown stronger and more resilient. My outlook on life has been brighter. I like to think that I smile a little more, dream a little bigger, laugh a little louder. I believe that Rain and photography had a large part to do with that.
To be honest, I am not entirely sure if it is the actual act of photography that I am so enamored with. I suppose it is a combination of several things, the smallest of which may actually be photography itself.
I absolutely enjoy taking shots of things I find beautiful. Most of the time they are sunsets and mountains and clouds. Occasionally they will be emotions. Rain has been my subject countless times as well.
Seeing those moments captured by what seems to be my vision, my eye, creates a feeling of satisfaction that is quite addictive. But that really isn't all there is.
No, photography has become more than trying to capture a beautiful image for me. It has become an outlet and an inlet. An outlet to forget the day to day mundaneness and lose myself in the small and large overlooked wonders of the world around me. An inlet to discover and rely on the child inside me and foster the creativity that I believe I once had.
It's taken me 28 years to learn how to trust in that child. Actually I take that back. 28 years to START learning how to trust in that child.
Photography has also become a much valued time that I spend with Rain. She irritates me sometimes. Wandering off to find some deer poop to munch on. Crying when I tie her up so that she doesn't wander off to find some deer poop to munch on. Rushing off whenever other people or dogs come close. Half the time is spent taking pictures, the other half is making sure Rain isn't off doing something mischievous.
But I think she enjoys coming along. She makes it so much more fun. She's funny too. Munching on deer poop. Lol. And when I catch her, she's like a deer in headlights. Could I get better shots if she weren't there? Probably. But it's hard to say that I would be out there if she weren't. I like to think that my photography has been improving because of her, not despite her.
I just read over what I wrote, and I guess I didn't really document much of anything. Just rambled on a little about how I felt about my dog and taking pictures. But that really was my 2012.
Rain. Photography. And how they have changed my life.
It was a good year.
See you in 2013.
Actually, Shinji, you said a lot in your "ramblings". I'm glad that you're re-exploring your "inner child" of creativity. You have a lot of talents! Do you still keep up with your music? And Rain provides constant companionship and opportunities and, as you said, may have provided the impetus for you to be doing this. I look forward to continued artistic magnificence with your camera, your dog, and any other muse that may inspire you to create. Hau'oli Makahiki Hou! Gambatte!
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